November 22, 2024

Honouring Grief: Understanding the Journey to Healing and Growth

Published: November 22, 2024
By: Grit Psychology

Honouring Grief: Understanding the Journey to Healing and Growth

Written by Grit Psychology in honor of National Grief and Bereavement Day, November 19. 

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Grief is one of life’s most universal experiences, yet it is profoundly personal. Each person navigates it differently, shaped by their relationships, circumstances, and inner world. National Grief and Bereavement Day reminds us to reflect on the multifaceted nature of grief and the importance of embracing a healing journey that is uniquely ours.

The Many Faces of Grief

Grief is often associated with loss through death, but it can emerge in response to a wide range of experiences, such as the end of a relationship, loss of a job, or significant life transitions. Recognizing the different types of grief can help us understand our own responses and those of others:

  • Acute Grief: This immediate, intense grief often follows a sudden loss, bringing overwhelming feelings of sadness, shock, and disbelief (Brown et al., 2022).
  • Anticipatory Grief: Experienced before an impending loss, such as a loved one with a terminal illness, it blends hope and mourning as individuals prepare for what is to come (Jacobsen & Petersen, 2020).
  • Complicated Grief: For some, grief becomes prolonged and deeply entrenched, making it hard to engage with daily life or find peace (Wilson et al., 2020).
  • Disenfranchised Grief: Losses that society may not recognize or validate, such as miscarriages or the death of a pet, can lead to feelings of isolation (Castellato, 2022).
  • Cumulative Grief: Multiple losses in a short period can amplify emotional strain, leaving individuals with little time or energy to process (Galanos & Labriola, 2022).

The Intersectionality of Grief

Grief intersects with identity, culture, and lived experiences, shaping how it manifests and is processed (Benham & Hoerst, 2024). For example:

  • Cultural Norms: In some cultures, grief is expressed openly, with public rituals and ceremonies. Others encourage quiet, internal mourning (Silverman et al., 2020).
  • Gender and Social Expectations: Men may feel pressure to appear stoic, while women might be expected to express emotions freely. These roles can complicate the grieving process by imposing external expectations (Benham & Hoerst, 2024).
  • Marginalized Identities: LGBTQIA+ individuals may experience disenfranchised grief if their relationships or losses are not acknowledged by society (Shepherd et al., 2021).

Understanding these intersections fosters empathy and ensures that grief support is inclusive and respectful of diversity.

Comorbid Disorders and Grief

Grief doesn’t exist in a vacuum; it can intersect with or trigger mental health challenges, including:

  • Depression: Prolonged grief can blur into clinical depression, marked by hopelessness, withdrawal, and persistent low mood (Wen et al., 2023).
  • Anxiety Disorders: The uncertainty of life after a loss can exacerbate fears or lead to heightened stress (Curtiss et al., 2021).
  • Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD): If the loss was sudden, violent, or traumatic, individuals may experience flashbacks, hypervigilance, and emotional numbness (Wen et al., 2023).
  • Substance Use Disorders: Some may turn to alcohol or drugs as a way to numb their pain, creating further challenges (Caparrós & Masferrer, 2021).

Being aware of these potential outcomes is crucial. If grief seems to spiral into these patterns, seeking professional support is an essential step toward healing.

Honoring Your Grief Journey

There is no “right” way to grieve. The notion of “moving on” can feel dismissive or even impossible for many. Instead, the focus should be on “moving forward” — learning to live alongside grief while finding ways to honor your loss and reclaim joy (Darbonne, 2023).

  1. Acknowledge Your Feelings: Allow yourself to feel the spectrum of emotions, from anger and sadness to moments of relief or even joy.
  2. Create Rituals of Remembrance: Whether through journaling, creating art, or lighting a candle on special dates, find ways to honor what you’ve lost.
  3. Engage in Healthy Coping: Physical activity, mindfulness, or seeking therapy can help regulate emotions and provide relief.
  4. Set Boundaries: Grieving individuals may face unsolicited advice or pressure to “move on.” It’s okay to assert your needs and seek supportive spaces.
  5. Seek Support: Grief is less heavy when shared. Whether it’s with a trusted friend, support group, or counselor, connection can be profoundly healing.

Growth Through Grief

Grief changes us. While the loss remains a part of our story, it doesn’t have to define us. Post-traumatic growth is the process of finding strength, resilience, and new perspectives in the wake of hardship. This doesn’t mean forgetting; it means integrating the loss into your life in a way that fosters meaning and connection.

National Grief and Bereavement Day is a call to action: to honor our losses, embrace our unique journeys, and support one another in finding healing. In grief, there is no finish line, but there can be growth, love, and hope.

If you’re navigating loss, know that Grit Psychology is here to help you chart your path forward with compassion and care. You don’t have to walk this road alone.

References 

Benham, C., & Hoerst, D. (2024). What role do social-ecological factors play in ecological grief?: Insights from a global scoping review. Journal of Environmental Psychology, 93, 102184. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jenvp.2023.102184 

Brown, R. L., LeRoy, A. S., Chen, M. A., Suchting, R., Jaremka, L. M., Liu, J., Heijnen, C., & Fagundes, C. P. (2022). Grief symptoms promote inflammation during acute stress among bereaved spouses. Psychological Science, 33(6), 859–873. https://doi.org/10.1177/09567976211059502 

Caparrós, B., & Masferrer, L. (2021). Coping strategies and complicated grief in a substance use disorder sample. Frontiers in Psychology, 11. https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2020.624065 

Castellato, G. (2022). Disenfranchised grief in contemporary society. Summus Editorial. 

Curtiss, J. E., Levine, D. S., Ander, I., & Baker, A. W. (2021). Cognitive-behavioral treatments for anxiety and stress-related disorders. Focus, 19(2), 184–189. https://doi.org/10.1176/appi.focus.20200045 

Darbonne, A. (2023). Navigating Grief Workbook: Evidence-Based Exercises to Move Through Grief and Heal. Simon and Schuster. 

Galanos, A. N., & Labriola, M. K. (2022). How we manage grief. Clinc Adv Hematol Oncol, 20(9), 561-563. https://www.hematologyandoncology.net/archives/september-2022/how-we-manage-grief/ 

Jacobsen, M., & Petersen, A. (2020). Exploring grief. Taylor and Francis. 

Shepherd, B. F., Brochu, P. M., & Stripling, A. M. (2021). Hidden grief is complicated: Identity concealment as a minority stressor and relational-cultural barrier among bereaved sexual and gender minoritized elders. Psychology & Sexuality, 14(4), 596–613. https://doi.org/10.1080/19419899.2021.1970618 

Silverman, G. S., Baroiller, A., & Hemer, S. R. (2020). Culture and grief: Ethnographic perspectives on ritual, relationships and remembering. Death Studies, 45(1), 1–8. https://doi.org/10.1080/07481187.2020.1851885 

Wen, F.-H., Prigerson, H. G., Chou, W.-C., Huang, C.-C., Hu, T.-H., Chiang, M. C., Chuang, L.-P., & Tang, S. T. (2023). Comorbid prolonged grief, PTSD, and depression trajectories for bereaved family surrogates. JAMA Network Open, 6(11). https://doi.org/10.1001/jamanetworkopen.2023.42675 

Wilson, D. M., Darko, E. M., Kusi-Appiah, E., Roh, S. J., Ramic, A., & Errasti-Ibarrondo, B. (2020). What exactly is “complicated” grief? A scoping research literature review to understand its risk factors and prevalence. OMEGA - Journal of Death and Dying, 86(2), 471–487. https://doi.org/10.1177/0030222820977305 

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